Giving Him my best

Balancing my life is not as simple as I always hope it will be. 

I try to feel satisfied in all areas, but not too long after I feel like I had a good day I find that everything falls out of whack.

Know what I mean?

©2009-2011 *Tailgun2009

In my current challenge of faith, I'm reading a study by Priscilla Shirer called The Resolution for Women.  It is starting on week six today, but I'm finding I need to slow down before I move on. The first part of the book focused on "This is Who I Am", and moving on to "Part II. This is What I Have" is too soon for me.  You see, I am in that spot where I know what I believe, but what I believe will require me to step in full trust in the Lord, a place few of us readily admit to doing in our entire life. Maybe we give God parts to control, but we never give Him all of it. We never ask Him, "Good morning, what do you want me to do first today, Lord? .. Brush my teeth or shower? ... Eat or not eat yet? ... What do I eat today? ... " Days that we do that, we surrender our own plans, our own to-do lists, and let Him guide us.

I HAVE DONE THIS BEFORE! It is possible and friend, these are the most rewarding days I have EVER lived!

I want to share this because I need to admit that I have this level of trust with God, but I am shamefully digging my heels in the dirt, hanging on to every last bit of control in my own hands--why? Fear? But fear is not from God. Fear is from Satan. Well shoot. I just want to do this, but I'm scared. I'm scared because it is a literal constant challenge. Every moment, every single thing can be a decision to follow or to deny God's power to do things in my life. And people are watching.

People are watching. Believers are watching. Nonbelievers are watching. So, why am I not letting God change me? Isn't that the best I can do? Oh goodness. I know what I want to do next, spend some time with Jesus. Right. Now.